Ups & down.

So hi guys.

I decided to update because i've got so much things to say today. Right, so i shall begin.

There are times, when i feel like massive shit. Also, most of the time people ignore me. they criticise me, mock me, laugh at me. But you know, usually i'll just laugh and get over it. People thinks that i'm the happy one.

But honestly, i am not. Although i smile, and giggle but sometimes i really wish i would stop being so fake. I've been labelled fake today. Because there's this guy, who thinks that i act nice to my friends and i'm just a fake plastic doll with weird emotions.

:(

I am sorry. I did not meant to be fake, i just dont know who i am anymore.

Should i smile and laugh about this? Idk. Should i cry and scream? I did it today. Should i retaliate? I already did. And what did i gain?

Exactly nothing.

So what should i do now, although i acted like everything was okay but you know there's this fucking heavy stone in my heart. I feel so god damn ugly.

Damn it. Why? Do people really hate me so much? Sigh. I feel so hated, unwanted, useless. So many things has happened today.

I wish i could just fade away now. really. 21st decemeber 2012, i'll be waiting for you. Please come true.

Thanks all, for labelling me. Really. ;-) Now i understand what a fake person i am. because i was already fake from the start.

A fake plastic doll, with weird emotions. ;-) Thank you.